Top 10 Lessons of 2010 (I know, it's late)

Notice she's clutching her water-must stay hydrated

Oh Coach George, you are a riot! Must suck up to coach to get maximum play time.

She has mastered the cookie scoop!

This is a picture of Grandma-note the curly hair. I am not sure where Grandma's body is, but we'll work on that.

Guilty smile after discovering....

she had been hiding her socks behind her bed during nap time!

Valentine's Day-daddy bought them flowers

My attempt at Toddlers & Tiaras-putting makeup on little faces is hard! I give those crazy pageant moms credit. Sorry Stella, you'll never make it into the Sexy Southern Baby Glitz Pageant with me as a stage mom.

Top 10 Lessons of 2010

(better late than never, right?)

1. Children can be extremely clumsy. However, they can remove the tiniest piece of broccoli from a parent's attempt at hiding it in a dish with the dexterity of a surgeon.

2. Vomit has no warning signs in small children.

3. They have no concept of real time. "Mom, do you remember next year last week when I went to fishing with Grandma Polly in her boat and Papa John shot the alligator?"

4. They have the memory of an elephant. (See #3)

5. Reasoning skills improve with age.

Stella: Mom, can I have some of your drink?

Me: No, it's not for kids. (it was a soda)

Stella: Why not?

Me: Because soda will make you stop growing.

Stella: Then why do you drink it? Don't you want to grow?

Me: Nope. I'm finished.

Stella: Is that why daddy eats chips? 'Cause he's finished growing, too?

Me: Um...yes.

6. Road trips are not for the weak. (See #2) p.s. Vomit smell gets into your pores.

7. Even though your kids are having a great time at a party at 10:00 p.m., it's never a good idea. They don't know how to sleep late to make up for it. (at least, not in our house)

8. I've said this before, but I'll say it again-we should learn a thing or two about eating from them. Kids eat continuously all day. They don't get the three meals a day concept and they are probably on to something.

9. Bodily functions are nothing to worry about it when you are having a good time. Who needs to actually go to the bathroom when you are playing a game? Just go. Right there. You can change later, when the game is over.

10. It takes approximately three times to memorize a book and realize that mom or dad is skipping pages or shortening sentences.